Monday, August 10, 2009

Three Passions by Bertrand Russell


Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind. These passions, like great winds, have blown me hither and thither, in a wayward course, over a great ocean of anguish, reaching to the very verge of despair. I have sought love, first, because it brings ecstasy - ecstasy so great that I would often have sacrificed all the rest of life for a few hours of this joy. I have sought it, next, because it relieves loneliness that terrible loneliness in which one shivering consciousness looks over the rim of the world into the cold unfathomable lifeless abyss. I have sought it finally, because in the union of love I have seen, in a mystic miniature, the prefiguring vision of the heaven that saints and poets have imagined. This is what I sought, and though it might seem too good for human life, this is what at last I have found. With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway above the flux. A little of this, but not much, I have achieved. Love and knowledge, so far as they were possible, led upward toward the heavens. But always pity brought me back to earth. Echoes of cries of pain reverberate in my heart. Children in famine, victims tortured by oppressors, helpless old people a burden to their sons, and the whole world of loneliness, poverty, and pain make a mockery of what human life should be. I long to alleviate this evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer. This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly live it again if the chance were offered me.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Mr.Children - Hero



This song really inspired me alot, well.. u would probably feel nothing if you don't care about yourself and the people around you. Think for a while.. that you could do something about everything to make a change, to make things better for people and yourself. This song is a song for every person, every real strong person, but of course with unseen weakness from inside. I love the person I love and anybody else which means alot to me.
This is the english translated lyrics to the song.

Supposing that the world could be saved
by one person giving their life in exchange,
I would be the man who waits until someone else has volunteered.

All those dear to me have made me a coward.

I don’t expect to be like my idols
whose actions and mannerisms I imitated as a child.
But I’d like to be a hero,
just for you,
to reach a hand out to you,
when you stumble or fall.

To make an awful movie more exciting
they casually kill off people on screen.
But they’re wrong, what we want to see is a light full of hope.

the slightly smaller hand in my hand
silently melts away the gloom in my heart.

the many spices that one needs to really taste life’s full course
are prepared for everyone.
sometimes they’re bitter
and you’ll think the taste astringent.
and then you’ll eat your last desert with a smile.
I want to be next to you.

through the cruel passage of time,
surely even I’ve become adult enough.
I’m not sad, and it doesn’t hurt
just having kept going, and keeping going
is enough to make me happy, is precious.

I always want to be a hero,
just for you,
there’s nothing mysterious about it,
at this point there’s nothing to hide.
but I want to be a hero,
just for you
to reach a hand out to you,
when you stumble or fall.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Summer Bossanova

Gawd, tomorrow is my exam, I'm so screwed, I really hope I dun get nervous and flop everything. Anyway, here's the lyrics to the song that I wrote. Hope yall like it. Chao..

Summer Bossanova


Have you noticed?
Clouds actually appears every morning without fail,
when you thought the night before,
the skies were empty and all the stars seems
so far away.
Even once when the sun was glaring at my face,
it reminds me of your smile.
when i was down in my life.
the breeze came to brush my skin
it seems like u've somehow send
the winds to embrace me.

Gentle sound of the waves reminds me of that
first gift, a mixtape you once present me.
I wont forget the days of laughter and the
trips we took, eventhough when it's raining,
we danced till it all ends.

You've sent me a song,suddenly,
about everything you and I used to love.
Like bossanova, like the smoothest jazz, something
that sings like a July's Lemonade.
Oh~ a love song, worthy of remininsce.
There is nothing more soothing than your gift.
I would give up anything to go on a trip themed with
this song.
If it was afterall just a movie, it'll always be our theme.

Everything you love, i learn to love it.
Everytime you go, i'll stay, water the seeds that have been sold. One day this tree, will mark our existence here.
Well it's okay if you're not around, I'm fine, I understand.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Suddenly Missing You - Mayday

Sorry people, this few weeks was really very busy with my work, exams and other activities. Kinda like stressed up.. Hello pimples! heh! Anyway, I listen to this song and also tot bout someone. =D Nice song from mayday.. and translated english lyric. Oh yea, and finally hope successfully finishing the whole season, I'm going back to KLpac.. wish me luck.. July 16-19 - HSBC classical. Check out www.klpac.com to book ur tics.. =D



Mayday (Wu Yue Tian) - Tu Ran Hao Xiang Ni

i'm most afraid that the air would suddenly be quiet
most afraid of the concern that friends sometimes give
most afraid that memories would suddenly roll again
hurting with no rest
most afraid of suddenly hearing news of you again

if my longing had a voice
i wouldn't want it to be a sorrowful cry
things have come to this
i finally belong to myself again
just that i can't deceive myself yet because of the tears

i suddenly miss you
where could you be
are you happy or sad
i suddenly miss you
the sudden piercing memory
the suddenly blurred eyes

we are like the most beautiful song
turned into two sorrowful movies
why did you
lead me on the most unforgettable jouney
and then leave the most painful souvenir

we were so sweet, so beautiful
so trusting
so crazy, so passionate in the past
why did we
have to run towards our different happiness
and grow old with our regrets

i suddenly miss you
where could you be
are you happy or sad
i suddenly miss you
the sudden piercing memory
the suddenly blurred eyes

i'm most afraid that the air would suddenly be quiet
most afraid of the concern that friends sometimes give
most afraid that memories would suddenly roll again
hurting with no rest
most afraid of suddenly hearing news of you again
most afraid of having decided to live this life alone
without you but yet suddenly
hearing news of you again.....

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Sing-Along Song

Sung by Khalil Fong (Fang Da Tong)
Well, i've been busy these days with work.. and seldom have the time to relax, been so damn tired.. and i heard this song.. really love it so much.. Hope you like it too. Somehow it relaxed me. =D Cmon! Sing along song! dam dam!



I wrote this song it's not too long
cos' I've been thinking 'bout you
I wrote this song maybe I'm wrong
To be caught up about you

Well I dont know what you think 'bout me
Maybe you think nothing at all
But maybe you could just lie to me
And we could be in love you see

Oh it's a singalong song that's not too long
It's when I think about you that I hear songs
And you can singalong maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

I wrote this song it's not too long
Cos' I'm the one who loves you
I wrote this song this can't be wrong
I don't wanna smile without you

Well I just want to make you happy
but maybe you want nothing at all
and how I wish that you're meant to be
forever and a day with me


Oh it's a singalong song that's not too long
It's when I think about you that I hear songs
And you can singalong maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

In everyway you mean more to me
than you'll ever know
girl I'll do my best to show these words are true
and if you'd like to make a song
and be a perfect harmony with me
I'd find the greatest words sing
so we could write our own romance

Oh it's a singalong song that's not too long
It's when I think about you that I hear songs
And you can singalong maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

Oh it's a singalong song that's not too long
It's when I think about you that I hear songs
And you can singalong maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Koizora - Sky Of Love

Movie about a girl who falls in love with a nonchalant guy. One day the guy left her without giving her a reason and one day, she found out that the guy actually has cancer of the blood. He doesn't want her to go thru the pain and sadness, so he took it all to himself.

Tabidachi No Uta meaning "A song for taking off" is a song about how much the guy appreciate the girl when there is not much time left anymore. Sad story, sad song to appreciate and be contented to what we were given, eventhough it might not be satiable, but it is still worth while. I really can appreciate the lyrics and it meant alot to me Here's the MV, english translated lyrics and the trailer movie.


Mr. Children - Tabidachi No Uta


Tabidachi no Uta (A Song before Taking Off)

Don’t be afraid.
Even if you don’t go around turning on the lights
someday your lonely nights will see the dawn.

The day you fall you’ll get up and see that the scenery that felt
so very far away seems almost within reach.

the song you loved is playing throughout the town
it’s an incidental gift given to me by chance.

Ah, a song for taking off,
So, where to? We’ll meet again.
Ah but for now, it’s “goodbye”

When I lose sight of who I am,
I’ll turn to you
But even if you do somehow hear me,
don’t worry about responding
I lost something important to me,
and then got it back and like that process,

each time feels new again though
I said, “we can’t keep crying and laughing about it like this”
I wanted someone to share with.

Now without hesitation, I can say that I love you.
And that’s how I’ll spend my days.
No matter where I am.

Ah the last song sung in celebration of a fresh start
Now I wave goodbye.

Ah, farewell to sorrow!
when you get too tired to go on,
give a quick look back
because from somewhere out of reach
I’ll be there urging you onward.

Ah, A song for taking off,
So, where to?
We’ll meet again.

Ah but for now, it’s “goodbye”
When you start to forget who you are,
idly scan your memories
for throughout my whole body,
you’re there with a smile urging me onward
but don’t worry about responding.


Movie Trailer - Sky Of Love

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

French Jazz Violinist Stephane Grappelli Dead At 89



PARIS (Reuters) - French jazz violinist Stephane Grappelli, whose lively, elegant style captivated audiences for more than a half a century, died in Paris Monday after undergoing a hernia operation. He was 89.

A self-taught violinist, Grappelli came into his own with a style mixing tender lyricism and vivacious swing that made him one of the living legends of jazz in France as well as in the United States.

Regarded as the grandfather of jazz violinists, he continued staging concerts around the world well into his 80s, cutting a striking figure on stage with his thinning white hair, gaudy print shirts and violin tucked under his chin producing haunting music.

When asked on his 85th birthday if he was considering retirement, Grappelli replied: "Retirement! There isn't a word that is more painful to my ears. Music keeps me going. It has given me everything. It's my fountain of youth."

His agent, Jacques Chartier, told Reuters Grappelli died in a Paris clinic where he had undergone a hernia operation last week.

"His family called me this afternoon to tell me he was dead," Chartier said.

The Paris-born son of a philosophy teacher of Italian origin, Grappelli first worked as a pianist, accompanying silent films in a cinema to help his father pay the bills.

Classical violinist Yehudi Menuhin, a great admirer of Grappelli's improvization skills, once commented: "Stephane is like one of those jugglers who send 10 plates into the air and recovers them all."

The Hot Club of France quintet, a band he formed with gypsy guitarist Django Rheinhart in the 1930s, will be remembered as his major musical contribution.

The two met at the Croix du Sud Montparnasse nightclub in early 1934. Then, in Grappelli's own words: "One day he was strumming on his guitar, and I started to improvise with him."

With Reinhardt's brother, Joseph, and Roger Chaput on guitars and Louis Vola on double bass, the idea of the quintet was born.

"There were no microphones then, so it was hard for a violin to be heard. It was a revolution to play jazz only with string instruments," Grappelli said.



With their lively style and technical excellence, the group very quickly seduced the world. But World War II found Grappelli in London and Reinhardt in Paris, and though the quintet reformed in 1946, it never reached its pre-war heights.

Grappelli took to performing separately and made hundreds of records. In his later years, he was best-known for his recordings with Oscar Peterson, Jean-Luc Ponty and Menuhin, with whom he produced six records and performed his 70th and 80th birthday concerts.

Born Jan. 26, 1908, Stephane Grappelli grew up in Paris's lively 10th arrondissement. His mother died when he was 4, and he was sent to an orphanage when his father was mobilized during World War I.

When the war was over, he was reunited with his father, but the two were desperately poor.

It was during this period that Grappelli developed a passion for Claude Debussy and Maurice Ravel, two composers who had an enormous influence on the personal style he later forged.

When he was 13, Grappelli's father gave him a second-hand violin and taught him the scales. Enchanted, the boy learned with fervor.

His first concerts were in the courtyards of buildings and in restaurants, but by the time he was 15 he was working as a piano accompaniest for silent films.

"In the cinema, I had to play Mozart principally but was allowed some Gershwin in funny films. Then I discovered jazz and my vocation and kissed Amadeus goodbye," he said.

He later got a job as a pianist with Gregor's Gregorians, the most popular French show band of the time. When Gregor heard him play the violin one night, he persuaded Grappelli to devote himself fully to it.

Soon afterwards he met Reinhardt and they formed their famous quintet. But when the war broke out, Grappelli was in a London hospital and unable to return to France.

He established a band to play in hospitals and military bases. "But all the Englishmen had been called up, and so I had to recruit the handicapped. Blind George Shearing was on the piano and the bass player had one leg," Grappelli said.

He tried to re-form the Hot Club after the war, but a new style had come in. "Later there were groups like the Beatles who completely changed the direction of music," he said.

But Grappelli continued to attract audiences. When he played, it was as if he was in a world of his own, eyes half-closed and a smile that gave him a look of utter bliss.

"I play best when I am happy or sad, or when I was young and in love. If I have ordinary troubles, I forget everything when I play. I split into two people and the other plays," he said.

Even late in life, he improved his technique. "One hears something when listening to recorded music that one doesn't hear while playing it. And you find yourself saying, 'gee, one shouldn't do that, one should do it
differently."'

Grappelli had one daughter, Evelyn, and a grandson.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
I love you Grapelli, u're the best ever lived. U're the kickstart of my engine to keep me going in music. Rest in peace. Your music echoes for as long as we exists. I'll always remember what you mentioned that really inspired me to not only play music but live life.

"I play best when I am happy or sad, or when I was young and in love. If I have ordinary troubles, I forget everything when I play. I split into two people and the other plays," he said.

I thank God for I'm given a violin and the skill to play it eventhough there are infinite improvements to be made. And I'm taking the best of my time to play.


Friday, April 3, 2009

Quotes quotes quoting..

Not all scars show, not all wounds heal
Sometimes you can't always see
The pain someone feels.

Even the greatest bridges fall under the right pressure.

The bitterest tears shed over graves are for
words left unsaid and deeds left undone.

When I look in your eyes, I see the wisdom of the world in your eyes
I see the sadness of a thousand goodbyes.

The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.

When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.

Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source.It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing.

Love can sometimes be magic.
But magic... is always just an illusion.

For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.'

There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy.

Oh, sweet sorrow, the time you borrow, will you be here when I wake up tomorrow?

Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for.

Ever notice that even the worst bastards have friends?

Sometimes I feel like the city is sucking away at my soul.

This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time.

I can breathe and I can move, but I'm not alive because I took that poison, and nothing can save me.

I laugh, I smile, and I take Prozac

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Once upon a time of peace.

So my heart is made out of slow bossanova music. Always replaying the mood of lost memories, memories and experience that I miss and wish to relive it again. Have to admit, sometimes I just miss it so much that one tears suddenly just flow down and I have to faster wipe it off feeling surprised that it actually felt so deep inside. It keeps reminding me of the peaceful times. When things are getting fun and noisy which most of the time I wish to get in to, and then when it's happening, I tend to wish that I have quieter times and need to be alone. The worst part is the aftermath of happiness. Fragments of memories keep popping on and off. Then I ponder, should I always enjoy myself to the max and then will find out that I am actually sad when I come to know that everything has an ending. Really miss feeling satisfied and contented with the things I once had. Felt so numb. Miss the warmth. Right now, I would just want to hug my memories and go to dream world. Only there, I would find comfortable peace. And then.. wake up.. sucks. Unreality over reality.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Cancer Causing Facial & Body Products

Be aware not to use these products.


Friday, March 27, 2009

Trip to China Furniture Exhibition.


Arrive on the 1st day @ China World Trade Centre where the exhibition is held. Really a mega-structure and excellent architectural design. Really impressive building.



One of the exhibits.


If carry like this in malaysia sure kena saman already. I wonder how he climb up and stack up there.


China also like our malaysian style kopitiam.


Alot of pet shops around my hotel area. The pets selling there are really cheap. I can get a taiwanese pomeranian there for 1000rmb when i paid 3k ringgit for the same breed in Malaysia.


@ Shen Zhen airport
Fast forward to the last day, had lotsa fun and experience. Tired already. Go back sleep.

A Big Miss

Who and why am I writing this for? No bloody reason and direction at all. Sometimes we meet the people that leaves a deep impression. Be it even if it's a day or two. Does time really matter? Only when it seems right, when it could just happen over the next step, halt! hold for a while. Start hesitating for the unwillingness to risk it, risk the future, the influence of other people. Can you put down all that you have now and walk the road ahead with no assurance at all. Are you good enough, now that is the main question, but what if the other person doesn't mind at all. But not everybody has the same mind, or should I say it's mostly rare. What if it fails, then there's no plan B to cover up at all. Sigh, the ugly reality, I wonder why time keeps going forward, and doesn't even give u enough time to change or even think over it carefully for another moment. Our experiences always come late by a step. Because of this bloody lag, we lost lots of opportunities to make up to things. Why are we not clairvoyance? Why can't we have the ability to see further or even predict the future. Why live a life full of excitement and disappointment that leave so painful mark in our memories. Brothers and sisters living on the same planet, are you as tired as me? I just hope one day everything will be okay, and we will all be happy and walk in our own line of happiness where everything is happy, like heaven, I hope heaven feels like this. I hope by then everyone will have the same contentment and satisfaction. Be true to love. I hope everything will at least go the way I want. I'm not greedy, but I'm just selfish. If everything is enough for each one, if everything is made destined to be a pair. Then selfish won't exists at all. If everything is good, why would any reason I want to be bad at all. Then it's just good karma all the way. God's anticipation game sucks. God bless us.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

BE THANKFUL

FOR THE WIFE
who says it's instant noodle tonight,
because she is home with me,
and not out with someone else.

FOR THE HUSBAND
who is on the sofa being a couch potato,
because he is home with me
and not out at bars.

FOR THE TEENAGER
who is complaining about doing dishes
because it means she or he is at home,
not loitering.

FOR ALL THE NAGGING MADE BY MY BOSS
because it means I am employed

FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
because it means I have been surrounded by friends.

FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
because it means I have enough to eat.

FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
because it means I am out in the sunshine.

FOR A GARDEN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
because it means I have a home.

FOR THE PARKING SPOT I FIND
AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
because it means I am capable of walking
and I have been blessed with transportation.

FOR MY HUGE UTILITIES BILL
because it means I lived comfortably.

FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY
because it means I can hear.

FOR THE FILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
because it means I have clothes to wear.

FOR THE WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
because it means I have been capable of working hard.

FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
because it means I am alive.

FOR ALL OF THIS, BE THANKFUL

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Point of Departure

People come and people go. Sooner or later, one will realize that after all of his life pursuing what he believes, his dream, only to know that we, afterall just has no control over any happenings or situation. What we can control is actually just a small area in the whole gigantic area. We can change, but how would our changes affect anything or how can we know that our changes can affect the thing that we want to affect. What can one person in this world do to make a difference. Why can't we reach the things that we want so badly? Until some even gave up believing in dreams, and just let it be. Then we accept our weaknesses and limitations.

Vanity, all is vanity. Living life without a reason, satisfaction or contempt. Humans are insatiable, so how to be satisfied? For every differences among us, we have at least a requirement, a basic need of differences in level we desire. It is how we're brought up, what kind of personality have we become over our experience. I believe there are people who have been lucky and do their homework to keep up with what they want to have. These people are satisfied. These people are made to be satisfied. It is a talent or a gift. Why can't I keep something, it is because I'm not talented enough to do so. And another factor that the person doesn't acknowledge or understand that I am what I am. Or it is not the right time nor the right situation for things to happen. Shit happens, and it is what makes every human vulnerable.

I see them, whether dreams, people, objects.. juz walk away or even sometimes dissapear. Nowhere to be seen, leaving only painful tracks of memories and regrets. In the end, how strong one person try to be, we will end up reflecting the surfacing of our weaknesses. And only by acknowledging our weakness and moving along it, people say that we're getting stronger. But the real fact is that we can't do anything about it.

If only unity can be forseen. No hands would be left cold and shaking alone. Nothing will be lost or stole. Everything will go so well, then everyone would be happy and satisfied.



"Blessed are those who sees beautiful things in humble places where other sees nothing."

Tonight I notice the beautiful full moon in the dark sky as I was driving home. I hope someone would appreciate it too. Wherever we are, whatever we are, even if we can't embrace unity in this physical world, be comforted, that there is one place in yourself that you can find that haven, in your heart, your mind, and in your memories.

Be like anyone else, put your mask back on or whatever, but sometimes, just appreciate the beautiful view that will suddenly appear or pass you by, because u have to realize that days like these, may not last forever.

I missed out alot of things, I miss someone too, I miss a hell lots of people that have been missing me also. I hope dreams can be a reality without judging its weakness. Who say I don't love, I love~

Monday, March 2, 2009

Be Humble Be Wise


"Pride slays thanksgiving, but a humble mind is the soil out of, which 'thanks' naturally grow. A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks how he gets as much as he deserves. "



If a person is great, he is great. Don't need to boast about himself, and look down on people which he thinks is worthless to him. Real great, because he think that he can be proud, because his nose is real high up the sky, because he thinks that all given blessings can't be taken away or be surpassed. Every happiness doesn't last forever, and one day, even the strongest man would need someone's help. If a person is great yet he is humble, then really this man is a blessed person and are respected by others. The power to be humble. It is not easy to be when you are at a certain higher status. The richer a person, the harder to be humble. Once a quote "let us be humble, let us think that the truth and future may not entirely be with us."

Lately, I've met two person that I always knew who are making a progress in their life. One brags and look down on people, and another one encourages someone with his humbleness. I used the same approach in conversation, one just give you the "high nose" look, and another mentions "to be successful, being humble comes first". You know the feeling, when that someone pisses you off and just the right time, someone help you to vent it. Happened to me. I was really encourage when I see the differences between the worst lousiest person and then a humble person.

Conceited people. They are not only wearing a mask, these people naturally have spikes and thorns all over their body. Does sarcasm rings a bell, do you think that it is funny? I think for some people who can't accept it, their pride is assaulted. Sarcasm is an intention to make its victim the butt of contempt or ridicule. Come on, who are you to hurt people pride that way. Especially if their innocent.

"Talent is God given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be grateful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful."

Be humble! and realize that being humble is being a so much of a greater person that you are! I would feel more appreciation and surprise when I found out that u're such a talented person instead of you bragging it when I didn't ask. Everyone knows how to differentiate the difference between sharing your joy and bragging bout it. If you have something you're happy to share the good news too, by all mean, be humble about it, encourage another person. If it's possible lend them some advice and a helping hand if required. And always respect a person and don't vent your nonsense on an innocent person. Who knows, one day you might need them.

Blessed are they who see beautiful things in humble places when others see nothing.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Anthology Without Words



I was shocked when I was clicking around on the net and this music was playing. It's called "Anthology without words for solo violin and string orchestra" by Taro Iwashiro. Anthology means series of written effort compiled. As in literally writing. But this is a special arrangement by the above composer, and I think that it is perfect. I love the pace that it sets, the tranquil mood that it potray, and the hidden weeping underneath it. Kind of freakish for me, I really haven't felt this way for quite some time about a piece. It's like this piece is totally describing my feelings at this moment. Such gentleness in the melody as well as the violinist's tone even though it seems like forcing itself to describe a very mellow and sad scene. Interesting. Anyway, I'm looking for the solo violin music sheet notation, if anybody has, probably can send it to me at my email. Thanks.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Reflections from The Curious Case of Benjamin Button




"We were meant to lose people. How else would we know how important they are to us?"..


At first I was interested in this movie when I first find out about it, then >( i was wet blanketed by my colleague saying that the movie is really bad.. then he physco me to go watch Valkyrie and I did. *Yawn*.. Normal lah! Valkyrie, the suspense and climax doesn't impress me much. 2 Days ago, I went to watch the CCBB (Curios Case of Benjamin Button). So long to type juz abbreviate it only lah. This movie really gave me a good impression. Was a lil moody after the movie, was pondering about life. I always had this concept that I should live and make choices in life based on thoughts like "would I look back and regret it when I'm old?". So I don't want to regret nor can I avoid feeling regret in future. Afterall, we're human and we make unavoidable mistakes even though we try our best. You can't see urself, u're not 24 hours in front of a mirror, sometimes u just do things and you hurt another person out of your knowing.

"Benjamin : I was thinking how nothing last, and what a shame that is."

U see, one day, sooner or later we'll become old and old is just not old, you see an old person around everyday, but have you ever thought of how they felt, aren't you even curious wanting to ponder how does ur mindset and thoughts goes when u're old. The greatest battle is learning to accept the end of your life. When everything you ever knew will just dissapear from ur sight, and after u left for the other world, impression and ur existence will slowly fade over time in the thoughts of people. Sad isn't it. Vibrations of memory and feeling has it's decaying time as well. We're all taking it for granted, we're living life everyday thinking as if we would live forever. It is the biggest lie in life. Then only when you become old, u feel regret and unsatisfied. Like "it could have been" or "if only". Very sad words to say. I mean..Why waste it, every moment of seconds itself, is an opportunity life gives you. You can choose to waste it, throw it away or embrace it. Some people would expect nothing out of life, but I would say to them that they deserve much more than what they are. To live a life of purpose is to live a complete and perfect life. Who wants to feel useless. Every individual is an important person itself, and if I'm God, I would care for every single person on earth like we both exists only. So keep encouraging yourself.

"Daisy : Some thing lasts."

Benjamin Button is a fictional character which born an old man and die as a baby. In another word, a person living against time. How would you feel to see everyone getting older and you're getting younger. It's a total change of experience to ponder about.
It's a long movie, 2 hours plus i guess.. sit until backside also pain. But worth it, i like the pace and mood of it. Reminds me of movie like Meet Joe Black. =)

QUOTES from the movie

“We’re all going the same way. We’re just taking different roads to get there, that’s all. You’re on your own road.”

“You got to do what you’re meant to do.”

“It’s not about how well you play. It’s how you feel about what you’re playing.”

“Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss.”

“You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went. You can swear and curse the fates. But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.”

“For what it’s worth, it’s never too late to be whoever you want to be.”

“There’s something peaceful, even comforting, knowing the people you love are asleep in their beds where nothing can harm them.”

“It’s a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, feels the same, even smells the same. You realize what’s changed is you.”

“Life can only be understood looking backward. It must be lived forward.”

“You never know what’s coming for you.”

“It has no time limit. You can start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best of it or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things that you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. And if you find you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”

Friday, February 20, 2009

Vanilla Mood & VieTrio



Vanilla Mood is a group of japanese idol musician. Playing the instrument of their choice, Waka on flute, Yui on violin, Mariko on cello and Keiko on Piano.
I love their improvisation and the way the music is arranged. Very cool transition and variation. This MV is Haku, which means white and symbolized eternity. Composed by Keiko on how she feels about life. Emiri Miyamoto is also the replacement violin player for Waka(Flute) when she is not needed.






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Another band which I would like to introduce is VieTrio from Thailand. I am very suprised to see that this band is from Thailand. This band of siblings fuses pop with classical music. Very cool concerts and MV. I think you can even see them on a scene in Bangkok Dangerous movie.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Moon & Sunrise by Boa

Having to skipped school and high school to come to japan at the age of 15. Leave all familiar faces behind. Learned the language and tight schedule without rest for her career in Japan. She's a korea successful experimental singer to be trained since young to penetrate the Japan's entertainment market. Boa wrote and compose this song in the midst of her loneliness working in Japan. A sad song to cry for.



The blue is is always a lonely mystery
It seems like it is hiding my sadness and loneliness
Every time I go pass it...
Yes, again someday, I will keep the memories deep in my heart
Even inside our laughing happiness
Now it is time for the last days to come

*The winds are blowing
In the streets are there so many people
So your voice is becoming more distant

The sky is high
It is far away, just like your heart
Only tears are by my side
I cant forget you

The white clouds are always fickle just like the time and myself
The joy and the warm air is bound to change sometime
In those days we watched movies which turned into a revival
We dont know how the little children long ago, changed
How many memories can a person have?
But i can say it now, I cant see you now
The truth was, that i was happy with you.

**The moonlit night past and now the sunshine is shining
That is how I am forgetting
Even if I am faking my smile, smiling is still a beautiful thing,
Only the tears show my truthful side
I hope we can laugh together when we meet again..

Boa Working Video in Japan
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Emiri Miyamoto

I'm in love with Emiri Miyamoto. She is not only gorgeous but also very talented in the area that I appreciate. Violin'ing! haha.. She's a very good Japanese Jazz Violinist. Melt melt.. even though I think Taro Hakase & Iwao Furusawa are better players but she's still.. so.. sigh.. just beautiful.. XD muacks! She's also the daughter of famous world renowed Oboe-ist, Fumiaki Miyamoto.



Emiri Miyamoto Official Website

Friday, February 13, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is just around the corner. So let's talk about love a little. Even though I'm single now but what the hell, who want's to listen to my boring part of the story again right? So here goes.



As I'm visualizing myself into the relationship that I have assuming I'm in one now, and there goes, the person I love right in front of me. The first thing I would be saying when my feeling is idle now, not clouded by obsession and maybe honestly still a lil' bit of heartache, and also having realizing the fact of having and losing someone, I would be saying nothing to nothing, absolutely speechless. Enjoy the moment and sight for a while first, then ponder over it. Ponder, if this is a dream, and you wake up only to find out that u're in a sad and lonely world alone. Doesn't this gives u more clarity on what and where you're standing on now? It is quoted, "cherish it like you know you'll lose it". Happiness doesn't always come so easily, so learn to realize that while you're still in it, review over yourself to see if there are any reasonable spaces that can be improve.

Relationship would be classify in 3 types, the type that is just to get over with it and like it matters much and can't be bothered, the type that has not much choice already and I have to get one real soon, and the type that is the true love of your life. And do you agree with me most of it end up with the 1st 2 type or you're definitely disagreeing with me because you're in the 3rd type. Then I say to you, keep it up, since you're lucky enough, so don't take it for granted for when you let the good in, you'll also have to accept the bad and let it in. Nobody is perfect, sincerity and proving love takes time, give it the benefit of the doubt to wait and if it doesn't happen, ask yourself first that are you worthy of judging it or you won't regret the future. Always try to make up then break up, always try to fix what is broken and give chance to a repentance. It is always not too late, don't limit your mindset. Humans greatest weakness, shortsightedness, do not be a victim of this.

So I think to myself first before I contact the other person. First of all, what is love? How does all this have to begin with all the wonders of the world and ends with just a decision to give up everything you have ever dream for. Don't blame anybody if you love them, blame yourself, do not take the speck out of your brothers eye for there is a plank in your own eye. Blame yourself for not having the ability to judge, to choose and to realize.

Love is wonderful, and love is what drives us to survive and to protect. Love is what makes us perform very courageous acts and even meaningless sacrifice. Love gives, takes and even bites like a crocodile! haha! okay.. have fun ya'll. Happy Valentine's Day, there are bout 3 days in a year that is very important to me and one of it is this day. Don't kiamsiap k, guys buy that 99 roses or economy way fold 99x99 paper stars, cheesy, but it works. =D Don't need to think so much, just say what your heart feels. Wish you love and wish me luck!

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Happy or Not Happy & Leave me

I've found these two songs that I love to listen to lastime.



Tuesday, February 3, 2009

The Ending

Everything has to end.

Have you wonder, why everything has to end. Whether it is the end of a fun holiday where you get to meet all your families once a year, your bestfriend migrating to another place, your beloved pet dog which dies of old age, the end of your once in a life chance, the death of your beloved grandparents, the end of a wonderful relationship due to in-differences or mistakes that can't be forgiven, your own life has reached it's peak and u're breathing your last few seconds. Tell me, what is the difference the way you feel at each corner of your life and how I feel?



If you ask me why everything has to end, I would have to say that the culpirit is time. Your life is like blank square papers given at the time of your birth. Everytime the clock is ticking, your happenings are written and is thrown to to back while the paper burns off itself. Every moment is judged by time itself, whether it is a good or a bad moment, it still dissapears itself and become something that is known as memories. Good memories, bad memories, these are only the things that you can't turn back to undo. How sad is ones life in these hands of time, the cruel reality. Should we rather dwell in dreams, or just fight the battle to be as normal as possible like anyone else to ignore these delicate understandings of nature.

As it is written even in the Holy Bible and quoted by Gautama Buddha itself that life is afterall "short and miserable". When everything ends, do you feel sad? Have you felt that it could be better? Have your feelings reached the person? Have your dreams come true?

Our decisions and minds are the key of a time machine. It is important to know that it is not too late to change things. Change the presence and re-live the past as the future. It is possible to see familiar things again. Only with the agreement of mutual understanding and acceptance of the same ideas. It is never too late to bring out those old yellow lost love letters than u have kept rusty and dusty deep down inside your hearts.

Experience is the past, and that's where the root of who and what u are now, dwells. Reconsider your options, would you move along, or sacrifice for whatever that it is worth. Most important, is that you don't want to hurt something that once u know so precious to you.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

The Right Decision (Heartbroken)




Have you thought it over? Things that you worry about? Do you think what conclusion and solution that you came out with is the right thing to do? What if I tell you that it is wrong? Does it makes a difference? I mean who am I right to tell you what to do? I bet you know best how stubborn you are not willing to accept other peoples opinion especially the ones that concern them. Admit it, that the decision you make is for yourself only and it is not for the good of mutual benefit and improvement. Why are we all so selfish? What is making up compared to breaking up? What is giving compared to taking? What is warmth compared to cold? So many question even some of them seemed familiar to you but why are you ignoring it now when there was once you asked the same question. If you can't answer all this, you are not worthy of your own decision. Some people really do care for you, if only you climb high enough to see whats over the wall. Nobody is perfect, a person has it's good or bad, when you like the good, you have to let the bad in as well. I'm sure you're impressed by the goodness of a person, but think again, isn't the thing that makes you feel close and equal to the person is the imperfectness of the person. Isn't the imperfectness of a relationship gives it more room to expand. Only by leaping the obstacles together, solving a problems together, giving in to each others weaknesses, and by achieving that only you would be able to stay close to the person, hug her/him and say "we've been thru alot to get here together". Isn't that comforting. Isn't that love. Give it the benefit of the doubt, no one is a God to make absolute decisions. Listen to that person, call them back because I believe some of them seems like moving on, but they are still waiting. And if you're honest enough, I'm sure they'll soften down for you.



Happy Holidays! Happy Chinese New Year! Wish you a peaceful year.

Monday, January 19, 2009

I Am No King


i am no king - sharizan



I Am No King~~ Not the ruler of the sea~~ I Am No King~~ And I can't give you everything~~ I Am No King~~ Nor have I ever been~~ I Am No King~~ But I treat you like a queen..

Super old song, but I love this song since young, I alwiz loved to watch Sharizan Borhan and now he's the so called King of Swing Jazz in Malaysia. Another Sharizan latest track below. Fly Me To Da Moon.

Already Number 27


Was pondering, how the hell did i turn the age of 27 already. Come to think of it, 27, it has been 27 years of experience whether in good or bad, happiness or pain, achievements and mistakes that I make. Flashing back I've had many people who came in to my life who are so amazingly wonderful and also the pain that I have cause them, and cause me.

I've tried so hard training myself musically over the years dreaming to bloom in this aspect that I've chosen. Many times I have discourage myself by the many better talented people than me. Eventhough so, I've keep taking time off to think over it myself and went over it, leaped over it. Like they always say, if you're tired, just rest for a while, then continue the journey, if you're sad, then just cry, then sleep and wake up to a new day. Everything goes on whether you like it or not, you still have to wake up early the next morning to continue your life. So again, what is the point of grieving. Not only I, but we feel discouragingly sad all the time, I once read a beautiful poem, and it is written so, "I finally opened the windows, and the blue skies greeted me, the sun rays warms my cheek."



If everybody stays closed, then everything is closed. If you open your eyes to see the newest possibility that could be, would be and should be, then it'll sure be there. Like I always say, just give it the benefit of the doubt, not every new situation will turn out to be like the last one. A new world is blessed with endless possibility depending on how you root and nurture it.

I've lived a life praying for wisdom, and then I realize that it is not wisdom afterall that will bring happiness but only peace in our heart can. The ability to have peace during storm and the ability to bring peace to another person. "To touch the person in a way that no others can", I'm very familiar with this quote, someone once very dear to me wrote this on a piece of paper to me. Let this be the goal, i would nail this dream in my heart to bring happiness to another person in whatever way I can. Bypass my weaknesses, discard it and keep the process as my guidance to tell anyone that requires this comforting advice.

Today I have failed, put all my heart in faith rather than words or action, and still I have failed. But would I let this discouragement and disappointment devour me? No, being a lonely soul myself, I would not give up so easily, because faith can move mountains and shake the earth, I believe in that. Also this is a good practice for me to be more patient. I am afterall, just a normal person who wish for a happy ending myself.

We only live life once. A life worthwhile is a life lived for not just others, but for yourself and myself also.

A quote I compose for everyone.


Life is about everything you are able to describe.
But what really matters is life in the heart of your beloved,
was, is, and will............................................
always just be Love, Love and Love, and Only Love.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Silent Darkness



I told myself, don't think so much of life, it doesn't bring any happiness at all, it's just our human weaknesses to feel so bad. So just close my eyes of what's happening to me and around me. And play music, just play, dun care if the world collapses, I don't know how to care anymore, because I am only one person, with 2 hands, and those hands are shaking, dying to be appreciated and after I lent it out, turns out to be not fruitful at all. So I'm gonna stop finding the answer why or keep explaining, there are million of reasons out there, but I'm not going to even listen to one. I wanted to say I love you, but I dunno what or who I am loving, so I just remain silent. It's just overwhelmingly confusing, this life, it is full of vanity. Eventhough, I am willing to accept, but does it makes a difference at all? Can I at least say one thing? Can I just tell you, that it is unbearable, this pain some of us felt, this pain that hurts so much to tell them something that is so true. Why every beginning of the day is with light and ends with darkness? I rather have it the other way.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Horoscope Personality Traits

So you don't believe in horoscope? What bout me? well, I would say that I believe on the personality part of it and not the fortune telling future type. Those horoscope columns in the newspaper is crap, I have a friend which works in The Star and he said the columnist have to think of every new idea everyday to write it in, it's just random, not really true. But! This part about the personality, I think it is justified by many centuries of astronomical studies during the medieval era. Even up to now. People's character and personality are classified based on the shapes formed by stars at different time of the year. So here's the fun part, below are the personality traits of each horoscope according to the dates. Don't freak out if it's almost so true. I'm scorpio btw and I'm a true scorpio. What bout u?



CAPRICORN - The Go-Getter (Dec 22 - Jan 19) Patient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny.. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be Unfriendly at times... Like competition. Get what they Want.


AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality.


PISCES - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20) Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative..May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Don't like details. Drea my and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful.



ARIES - The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19) Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge.. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse. (Easily angered.) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic.



TAURUS - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20) Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings that are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate... Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous.


GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable But needs to express themselves. Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally.


CANCER - The Protector (June 21 - July 22) Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic.


LEO - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22) Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help Others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sen sitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive.



VIRGO - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22) Dominant In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argume ntative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hardworking. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to.Hard to please. Harsh.. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.


LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22) Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal... Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too
easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.


SCORPIO - The Intense One (Oct 23 - Nov 21) Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive... Determined. Loves being in long Relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional.



SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21) Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome)..Indulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing.. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes.. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out.